A boss wondered why his computer technician, one of his most valued
Employees, (you can tell this is a joke and not real life) had not
arrived at work & had not phoned in sick either.

Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialled the
employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.
"Hello."
"Is your daddy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your
Mommy there?"
"Yes."
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave! a message, the boss
asked, "Is anybody else there?"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman"
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss
asked, May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?"
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered
answer.

Growing more worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through
the ear piece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A helicopter" answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.
Again! , whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed
the helicopter."

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are
they searching for?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle: "ME." :rofl:

to turn the clock back this weekend!

Goodmorning.... and happy Friday!

:jive:

Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. One of the old ladies pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.

Maude: What in the hell is that?

Mabel: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.

Maude: Where did you get it?

Mabel! : You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Maude hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.

The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.

"Doesn't matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a Camel."

The pharmacist fainted.

October 27, 2006 Edition 2


London: Women are grumpier than men in the morning, says a survey.

The study by the Sleep Council found 13% of women are in a bad mood for up to four hours after waking, compared to 10% of men.

Spokeswoman Jessica Alexander said: "Many more men than women claim to get a good seven nights' sleep a week, so perhaps it is not surprising that more women than men get out of bed on the wrong side."

Of those studied 40% blamed their bad mood on a disturbed night, while 24% point to stress and worry. Londoners are the grumpiest, but only 7% of people in northeast UK get seven nights' good sleep.

- ananova.com

Pigeon Pie Ala Sushi :innocent:

ok folks,

a question for the people that have done this before!!.....

which is the best way to cut perspex?

with out having to buy fancy tools, i have a jigsaw [but i have heard that a jigsaw can shatter the perspex? is this true?] , if that will help, this will just be a one-off cut that i have to do, so i dont want to incure to much cost!

thanks for the help {in advance}

Well done multi-agency force! ok:

Have a great day

:bday3:

Hi you guys
If you work in the motor trade and have a visa that will let you work in the UK then i might be able to help?

I am an ex industry manager who has his own Recruitment consultancy. I only recruit into the motor trade. Even though i have just kicked off i have Mercedes Benz (UK) (the importer not one dealership) as just one of my clients with Ford and Peugeot as well.

If you have had proper training and can get over here quickly then it might be worth your while taking a look at http://www.mirec.co.uk.

hope i can help but please remember that if you do not have a visa and some good industry experience then i am afraid that i will not be of much use to you.


have a good day.
:worthy: