08-06-2008, 11:15 AM
I just love reading your take on things, Sue! And am impressed with the way you're being provided for, financially especially, as I know how these expenses mount up. I nursed my Mum till her death from pancreatic cancer, back there in SA, and each month I wondered how we would find the funds for her treatment..(medical aid had run out by May each year what with dad's expenses too) but it was there when we needed it. (With grateful thanks to British and U.S. friends).. so I know you will have what you need, when you need it. That was before my cancer.
And how pleased I am that your first chemo wasn't too bad. For me, it accumulated, and each time the reaction was worse. By the last one I was in dread to have that needle, trying to find a vein as they'd all gone by then, and hating that feeling of it going into my system. What a trial of faith that was for me! May you receive much grace and may it be better for you. We're all different. I needed the last week of each cycle, when I felt normal again.
The HAIR!!! :rip: It went and I was bald. The few wisps left were cut off, and I had a beautiful real hair wig by courtesy of the NHS.. and found it was too HOT to wear! So most of the time I wore scarves and pretty soft cotton hats - internet is great for that - and then in the winter I had some nice beanies which I became quite attached to. Then once radiotherapy was finished (had that too afer chemo) I went to my relatives in P.E. for summer there and everything was too hot so I just went without, and had a little No.1 haircut all over which I didn't care by then who saw and what they thought. Families are a gift, with their unconditional love. My hair did grow back curly - with the grey bits I'd been colouring before, so that was a surprise, to see how much there was!
But now it's back to its old self, maybe a tad weaker, but I colour it less often and let more grey show, I suppose like a trophy??
One of the many things I don't miss is 'chemo brain', it felt like my thoughts were all over the place and emotions too.. Sue, do take time off work when you're feeling bad or tired, the rest is good for your body.. (preach over)..
My after-treatment has been like clockwork, bone scans, hormone therapy (first Tamoxifen then Arimidex - no problems), mammograms, onc visits, and I feel safe. You will too.
Overriding it all was that innate knowledge that God was in control and going through it with me, step by step. He's absolutely amazing and strong and gentle etc etc.. and is for you too.
Take each day as it comes and enjoy it as you can. Some days you will be thankful that you'll never have again.. but at least you know that any rogue cells are being zapped forever.
Much love to you.
Jen
And how pleased I am that your first chemo wasn't too bad. For me, it accumulated, and each time the reaction was worse. By the last one I was in dread to have that needle, trying to find a vein as they'd all gone by then, and hating that feeling of it going into my system. What a trial of faith that was for me! May you receive much grace and may it be better for you. We're all different. I needed the last week of each cycle, when I felt normal again.
The HAIR!!! :rip: It went and I was bald. The few wisps left were cut off, and I had a beautiful real hair wig by courtesy of the NHS.. and found it was too HOT to wear! So most of the time I wore scarves and pretty soft cotton hats - internet is great for that - and then in the winter I had some nice beanies which I became quite attached to. Then once radiotherapy was finished (had that too afer chemo) I went to my relatives in P.E. for summer there and everything was too hot so I just went without, and had a little No.1 haircut all over which I didn't care by then who saw and what they thought. Families are a gift, with their unconditional love. My hair did grow back curly - with the grey bits I'd been colouring before, so that was a surprise, to see how much there was!
But now it's back to its old self, maybe a tad weaker, but I colour it less often and let more grey show, I suppose like a trophy??
One of the many things I don't miss is 'chemo brain', it felt like my thoughts were all over the place and emotions too.. Sue, do take time off work when you're feeling bad or tired, the rest is good for your body.. (preach over)..
My after-treatment has been like clockwork, bone scans, hormone therapy (first Tamoxifen then Arimidex - no problems), mammograms, onc visits, and I feel safe. You will too.
Overriding it all was that innate knowledge that God was in control and going through it with me, step by step. He's absolutely amazing and strong and gentle etc etc.. and is for you too.
Take each day as it comes and enjoy it as you can. Some days you will be thankful that you'll never have again.. but at least you know that any rogue cells are being zapped forever.
Much love to you.
Jen