06-07-2004, 11:44 PM
Here are my thoughts on the issue;
When I had my first child, almost 10 years ago now, I know I was much more prone to smacking than I am now with my third one, and I find they are just as equally well-behaved. (the baby is now almost 15 months and I haven't smacked her yet)
I have learned alternative methods to smacking her to get desired results just as well such as distracting her from a tantrum or undesirable behaviour. Praising her for a job well done, or fordesirable behaviour works well too.
There is the thought that the mother's hand should be for giving love and not for giving smacks, so the theory is that smacking with a wooden spoon or something like it would not be as psycologically damaging, as it is the inanimate object giving the smack, and not the hand. - In my experience, the end result is still the same, the child still has a sore bottom and the child is just as sorry for its behaviour.
I found I disliked it because I could not be sure that I was smacking too hard with the spoon, whereas with your hand you can feel when you're going too far or not. I still do have one called "Moeggepraat" which we threaten the kids with, but hasn't been used in years!
I think that parents should be allowed the right to choose for themselves what is the best method to discipline their children as each parent knows their child best. And if politicians want to criminalise parents who do choose to smack their children, they should then put more money and effort into educating parents as to more acceptable methods of behaviour management. Parenting is not easy, and most of what we do with our kids is a follow-on from what we've learned from our own upbringing, be it right or not.
When I had my first child, almost 10 years ago now, I know I was much more prone to smacking than I am now with my third one, and I find they are just as equally well-behaved. (the baby is now almost 15 months and I haven't smacked her yet)
I have learned alternative methods to smacking her to get desired results just as well such as distracting her from a tantrum or undesirable behaviour. Praising her for a job well done, or fordesirable behaviour works well too.
There is the thought that the mother's hand should be for giving love and not for giving smacks, so the theory is that smacking with a wooden spoon or something like it would not be as psycologically damaging, as it is the inanimate object giving the smack, and not the hand. - In my experience, the end result is still the same, the child still has a sore bottom and the child is just as sorry for its behaviour.
I found I disliked it because I could not be sure that I was smacking too hard with the spoon, whereas with your hand you can feel when you're going too far or not. I still do have one called "Moeggepraat" which we threaten the kids with, but hasn't been used in years!
I think that parents should be allowed the right to choose for themselves what is the best method to discipline their children as each parent knows their child best. And if politicians want to criminalise parents who do choose to smack their children, they should then put more money and effort into educating parents as to more acceptable methods of behaviour management. Parenting is not easy, and most of what we do with our kids is a follow-on from what we've learned from our own upbringing, be it right or not.