Posts: 478
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Quote:Originally posted by Persephone
Shells, I am so sorry to hear this. You and hubby must be devastated.
I know how you feel. Just two months after coming off the pill hubby and I were ecstatic that I'd fallen pregnant so soon, especially after we'd heard it could take months if not years. I suffered a miscarriagea couple of days after christmas so please feel free to email or pm me... we could probably both do with the support.
My thoughts are with you! Take care.
Love
LeighAnn
xxx
Oh, No!
I remember being so happy for you when you told us
I am so sorry for your loss, it breaks my heart to think of how devastated you and your hubby must be.
Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow.
--Mahatma Gandhi
Posts: 1,471
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Joined: Jan 2004
Quote:Originally posted by Persephone
Shells, I am so sorry to hear this. You and hubby must be devastated.
I know how you feel. Just two months after coming off the pill hubby and I were ecstatic that I'd fallen pregnant so soon, especially after we'd heard it could take months if not years. I suffered a miscarriagea couple of days after christmas so please feel free to email or pm me... we could probably both do with the support.
My thoughts are with you! Take care.
Love
LeighAnn
xxx
I'm so sorry to hear this, Perse! (((HUGS)))
>>~V~ę~ñ~ů~Ş~<<
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Quote:Originally posted by Shellsbells
Talk about having the most ecstatic and disheartning two weeks rolled into one!
After very recently having found out I was pregnant, I was determined to do everything in my power to make this pregnancy work .. having suffered a miscarriage 2 years ago which was both a very physical and mentally traumatic experience, particulary the first of me knowing I was pregnant was because I loosing a baby .... I just knew something wasnt right, and when I passed out after loosing so much blood, the hospital confirmed what I thought - so you can imagine what i went through, blaming myself thinking maybe if I knew I was pregnant at the time, this wouldnt of happened ....
... anyway within half an hour of finding out this time I went down to Boots to get my Folic Acid tablets, the thought of drink made me sick and I cut down from 20+ ciggies a day to five within 24 hrs (to those of you who smoke will know what a feat this is!)
Everything was going fine for the first few days of me finding out .... without becoming graphic ... and to cut a long story short .... I lost the baby this weekend.
I have to go for a scan tomorrow at 9am
I feel so so quilty (for what I dont know) and hopeless ... what is wrong with me that I cant carry a child. I feel absolutely mortified.
The only consolation I can give to newly expectant mums though, is that according to the doctors I have seen over the past couple of days ... blood loss ... brown or red ... doesnt necessarily mean a miscarriage .... each case is different.
If anybody has been through a similar thing ... talk to someone ... more so to those who have been through it .... we seem to be forgotten about sometimes.
Shells my heart goes out to you. I know how difficult this is and I pray that you find peace. Nothing can prepare you the pain that you will experience. My advise to you is to grieve when you have to, ask people not to change the subject when you mention your baby and encourage them to talk to you about it.
Find out exactly what caused it and don't be afraid to push the medical staff to send you to the frequent miscarriage clinic where they do all the test to find out what might have caused it. This really helped me after all the miscarriages we finally got the results and the problem and best of all a very simple sollution.
I would never get over my pain I know that now but I do feel encouraged knowing that the problem is treatable.
My advise to all hubby's would be:
1. Talk about it
2. never say there will be a next one (this is the one they wanted)
3. Never say if only...
4. Be prepared to take some responsibilitys over in the house etc and do this for as long as it takes. A woman who lost a child sometimes becomes a little lost to this world and go through the motions without really noticing things around her.
When this happened to me I found out know one talked about miscarriages and I felt so alone. I wish more people would share their grieve because it does help other people heal faster.
After nearly a 16 months suffering in silence I feel that I can move on now. Without the help of my hubby I don't know if I would have made it.
Please send me a pm if you want to talk.
Lots of hugs
Beertjie
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Joined: Jan 2004
Shells and Perse
I am so sorry to read what has happend to both of you. I have has 9 miscarriages and have felt the same guilt. The worst thing is that no one could tell me WHY this kept on happening. I was just told it is just one of those things. I eventually went for tests and it was discovered that it was a hormonal deficiency that caused me to miscarry in the early stages of my pregnancies. When I discovered I was pregnant with my daughter I was here in the UK and they put me on injections which I had to have every week to maintain the pregnancy. The specialist told me that this was the most common cause of misscarriage in the early part of pregnancy apart from nature taking its course.
I dont know how far pregnant you were, but I had 2 more miscarriages late in my pregnancy the last one was at 28 weeks. This was put down to an incompetent cervix and total negligence of my DR. I should have been given a stitch after the initial danger period of the pregnancy. I know that my baby could have been saved if I was not left to go through a natural labour of 18 hours. I was so full of guilt because I felt that I should have insisted that I have that stitch and I should have changed Drs. All the time while I was in labour I asked to have a cesaerian. I should have DEMANDED another doctor. I guess a lot of it was due to ignorance. You think that the trained medical staff know better.
I urge anyone who is worried about anything at all to DEMAND explanations and if they feel that something is amiss, INSIST on a second opinion. If anything is worrying you, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem, if it is enough to worry you, it is worth an answer.
I went through stages of blaming myself and then hatred towards the Dr until I reached rock bottom. It took ages, but with the help of a support group I came to terms with it, but I have never forgotten my babies. I would like to think that one day I will be able to hold each one of them.
If either of you or anyone else who has miscarried a few times plan to have another baby, ask to have a hormone level test. There are times when u miscarry because there is an abnormaility, but usually if you have repeated miscarriages, it could mean that there is something medically wrong that can be fixed to prevent them.
Both of you and all the other ladies who have gone through this pain are in my thoughts and prayers.
If you feel up to it, join a support group, they really do help you and your hubbys.
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Quote:Originally posted by angelbabe
Shells and Perse
I am so sorry to read what has happend to both of you. I have has 9 miscarriages and have felt the same guilt. The worst thing is that no one could tell me WHY this kept on happening. I was just told it is just one of those things. I eventually went for tests and it was discovered that it was a hormonal deficiency that caused me to miscarry in the early stages of my pregnancies. When I discovered I was pregnant with my daughter I was here in the UK and they put me on injections which I had to have every week to maintain the pregnancy. The specialist told me that this was the most common cause of misscarriage in the early part of pregnancy apart from nature taking its course.
I could have written this - our stories are very similar.
Same gene Factor V Leiden - causes early miscarriages and DVT
A simple dose of 75ml of asprin a day and after years of struggling I am now finally pregnant with our first child.
Posts: 210
Threads: 42
Joined: Jan 2004
Quote:Originally posted by Beertjie
I could have written this - our stories are very similar.
Same gene Factor V Leiden - causes early miscarriages and DVT
A simple dose of 75ml of asprin a day and after years of struggling I am now finally pregnant with our first child.
Congratulations Beertjie !!! I hope everything goes well for you. I am sure that there are many women who have a similar story to tell. I am just so fortunate that I have managed to have 2 beautifull children.
